FIC: Utterly Predictable

[ficwize]

Title: Utterly Predictable
Fandom: Primeval
Warnings: None. Nick/Stephen implied (but no more than in the show!).
Rating: General
Summary: A day in the life.
Disclaimer: Not mine, but I wish. :)
Dedication: Written for good_lioness for the primevalathon.
Prompts: Cranky bosses, stormy weather, and creme brulee (which I could not fit in, sorry!).
A/N: I hope you enjoy it! Many thanks to reggietate and fififolle for the rapid fast beta and suggestions. All remaining mistakes are mine.

******************


“We’ll be back at the office in an hour.” Cutter’s voice was tired, but cheerful. “The anomaly closed before we could return the creatures back to their time.”

“Of course it did.” Lester pressed his fingers to his eyes, wondering if Cutter’s words only sounded ominous because of the peal of thunder that echoed outside. “What precisely do you suggest we do with these… What are they again?”

“They’re Saltopus dinosaurs,” Cutter answered. “And I don’t know what we’re going to do. Keep them until we can dump them back in their own time period, I suppose.”

“And what time period is that?” Lester stared out of his office window. London was covered in a light fog, and rain drops splattered against the glass.

“The late Triassic period, about 225-222 million years ago.”

“Yes, whatever.” Lester turned to go back to his desk. “I will leave it in your very capable hands, Professor.”

“Abby is already looking up what these creatures eat, so we can care for them.”

“I trust it’s not people.”

“No, it’s not.” Lester could hear voices in the background. “These are little dinosaurs, not much bigger than cats.”

“How disgusting.” Lester shook his head. “Are you sure they weren’t seen?”

“Positive.”

“A dinosaur walking around undetected?” Lester couldn’t keep the skeptical note from his voice.

“It’s unlikely, but even if they were, most people will probably think they’re some sort ot exotic pet.”

“Delightful.” Lester sighed. “I’ll see you when you return. Please have the write up on my desk before the end of the night.”

“Of course.”

Cutter’s tone made Lester wonder if the scientist was deliberately trying to irritate him, but he let it go. Hanging up without another word, Lester sat down at his desk and shook his head. Five years prior he never would have believed that his job in life would be keeping tabs on dinosaurs. Of course, the creatures rarely provided half the problems that his intrepid team of dinosaur hunters did.

“Leek!” Lester hit the call button on his telephone, connecting him to the other man. “Find out how to best contain Salt Dinosaurs.”

“What, sir?”

“I don’t know. Google it and have the supplies here by the time Cutter’s team arrives back at the office.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Oh, and Leek? Order something for the damned things to eat.”

“What do they eat?” Leek sounded perplexed.

“That’s not my problem, Leek.”

“Yes, sir.”

Turning back to his computer, Lester opened his email. He wondered what his superiors would think about the fact that there would be live dinosaurs temporarily making their home at the ARC. Dear God, please let it be temporarily. Not for the first time, Lester wished that he had taken the promotion at MI-6 instead of accepting a promotion into more domestic and mundane fields.

He was nearly finished writing up the reports from the last incident when he heard Abby’s voice echoing up through the ARC main room. Climbing to his feet, Lester went and looked down through the glass wall into the circular space below. Abby was walking in with Cutter. The Professor looked up and met Lester’s eyes. He gave a mock salute and Lester nodded back, resisting the urge to shake his head.

The sight of Stephen and Conner trailing in after the other two was much more interesting. Stephen was covered, head to toe, in mud. Connor was staying a respectful distance away from Stephen, but it was clear that they were arguing. Unable to repress his curiosity, Lester went through the door and down the ramp.

“They’re harmless.” Connor’s voice was apologetic.

“They’re malicious and conniving. I think they’re dangerous.” Stephen sounded petulant.

Abby turned on her heel and grinned at the mud covered man. “They’re so cute.”

“Where are our guests?” Lester inquired.

“They’re in the loading dock.” Cutter appeared at Lester’s elbow, holding a cup of steaming tea. “And they’re not dangerous.” He fixed Stephen with a smug grin, as he sipped his drink. “You’re just mad because one of them bit you.”

“It hurt.” Stephen griped, glancing down at the bandage wrapped around his wrist. “It’s still bleeding!”

“Poor baby.”

The withering look Stephen threw Cutter at that comment made Lester cough to hide his laugh. He cleared his throat. “If you’ve been injured, you’ll need to fill in an incident report and have it seen to.”

Now Stephen’s look was directed at Lester. Lester raised an eyebrow in return. “It’s still bleeding.”

“It’s fine.” Stephen snapped.

“I trust nothing else is amiss?” Lester asked.

Raising a brow, Stephen looked down at himself. He was still damp and there was mud caked on his clothes, and drying on his hands and face. “I’m sure you mean other than the obvious?”

“Abby said not to try and herd them.” Cutter grinned. “She was right.”

“She was also standing out of the bloody rain and mud and offering advice from a safe distance.”

“On my orders.”

“Don’t think I didn’t realize that,” Stephen snapped. “Why do I always get stuck doing the dirty work? I mean, Abby is a bloody zoologist in training and I lost a shoe.”

Lester glanced down at Stephen’s feet. Sure enough, one foot was encased in a mud-covered shoe, and the other one was bare. “What happened to your sock?”

“I took it off,” Stephen grumbled. At Cutter’s amused snort of laughter, he defended himself. “It was wet and I got cold.”

“You’re a survivor.” Abby smirked. “And a lab technician.”

“And a junior fencing champion and a junior shooting Olympic prospect.” Lester pointed out, earning incredulous looks from Stephen and Cutter both. He resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Really, what did they think he spent his time doing?

“I didn’t know that.” Connor stared at Stephen with a bit of awe and a hint of envy. “I just thought you were one of those survivalist types.”

Stephen sighed. “I’m going to take a shower.”

“Have that arm looked at.” Lester ordered, turning to look at Cutter and Abby expectantly. “Are you going to show me our newest acquisition?”

“Sure.” Cutter shook his head, still watching Stephen stalk towards the showers in as dignified a retreat as he could manage. “Connor, I need you manning the Anomaly Detector. We want to the Saltopus dinosaurs home as quickly as we can.”

"I don't really know what you want me to do," Connor shrugged. "As soon as an Anomaly opens, the sirens go off."

"I know, but I've been thinking that there might be a pattern to how they're opening, or when." Cutter put his hand on Connor's shoulder and squeezed, leading everyone off the loading deck and into the main facility. "And we might not have much time to drop these little buggers off before the next Anomaly closes."

Connor looked skeptical. "I guess I can try running the data again."

"Good man." Cutter gave him a gentle push towards the computers and then backtracked to the loading dock. Lester and Cutter fell back, but Abby rushed forward to direct some of the soldiers on how to best unload the small dinosaurs.

“So this is it then?” Lester squinted at the cages. The small dinosaurs really were cat sized and appeared to walk on two hind legs. They had a relatively large tail that kept it upright and small forearms that bore several wicked looking claws. They were a pale green, almost gray color, and had large brown eyes. “It doesn’t look so dangerous.”

Cutter’s response was lost in the screeching noise that came from the cage. For a small dinosaur, it had an amazingly large – and grating – voice. Grimly, Lester crossed his arms. “The sooner we get these creatures back to their own time, the better. Did Stephen’s accident perhaps occur as a result of their melodic voices?”

For just a moment, Cutter’s dislike of Lester faded and he grinned. The sight of Stephen toppling headlong into a mud puddle as he tackled one of the Saltopus dinosaurs was one that Cutter wouldn't forget anytime soon. “Stephen will be fine. His pride’s just been bruised.”

“So he’s sulking.” Lester nodded, keeping his eyes firmly on the small cages being unloaded by the wary soldiers. “I can see why the two of you work so well together.”

Cutter turned with a furious expression, but a shout from one of the soldiers, complete with the clanging of a metal cage being dropped on the floor, and followed by a screeching Saltopus dinosaur gave Lester the perfect excuse to avoid a confrontation. He watched as the tiny dinosaur escaped and took off running through the open door into the main ARC room.

“Cutter!” Connor’s shout echoed back at them as the other small dinosaurs began screaming. Lester stood to the side as Cutter and several of the soldiers gave chase. Lester debated returning to his office to watch from there, but he quickly dismissed that idea and settled down to watch the festivities from where he stood.

The Saltopus dinosaur tore through the middle of the room, away from Connor who was still screaming Cutter’s name.

“I see it, Connor!” Cutter snapped. “Stop scaring it and help us catch it.”

The young computer wizard shut his mouth with a snap and abruptly started running after the escapee.

“Chase it this way, Connor!” Abby ordered. She had a blanket in her hands and Lester nodded. He’d always thought Abby had the most sense of any of them.

The two soldiers split up, circling one to the left and one to the right. Cutter pulled off his jacket and Lester waited to see if the trap would work. The Saltopus dinosaur turned to hiss at Connor and the young man squeaked in fear. Lester grinned and quickly hid it behind his hand.

“Now!” Cutter yelled and he and Abby both lunged forward. The dinosaur and the two dinosaur hunters fell into a heap. From where Lester stood, he couldn’t tell where the screeching was coming from, but he felt assured the cursing came from Cutter.

Finally, they subdued the small creature and Lester stood aside again as one of the soldiers rushed forward with a cage. “Be a good chap and don’t drop it this time.” Lester ordered mildly.

“You could have helped.” Cutter limped over holding his left hand against his body.

“And interrupted the perfect team dynamic?”

“Spare me the sarcasm.” Cutter muttered, looking down at his hand.

“You’re bleeding.”

“I can see that.”

“You’ll need to have it looked at.” Lester was having trouble containing his mirth. “And write up an incident report.”

“Stuff it,” Cutter snapped.

“I’ll leave you to do that later.” Lester looked pointedly towards the showers. “You and Stephen can lick each others… wounds.”

“Lester.” Cutter’s voice was flat and filled with warning and Lester decided he’d pushed far enough for the day.

“Well, if that’s going to be all the entertainment you offer for public consumption, I’ll leave you to it. Do be a good chap and make sure that you fill in that paperwork.”

Cutter glared at him, but his lips quirked in a small smile. “Later.”

Climbing the ramp back to his office, Lester turned to look at his colleagues. Cutter and Connor were leaning over the Anomaly Detector again. Whatever Cutter said, Connor nodded. Clapping him on the shoulder, Cutter cast a quick glance towards Abby, who was now directing the soldiers carrying in the cages. Lester saw her meet Cutter’s eyes and give him a quick wave to let him know she had the situation under control.

Apparently satisfied, Cutter turned towards the showers and went in search of Stephen.
With no one to see, Lester let the grin that had been threatening all day cover his face. Utterly predictable.

Lester had just settled in to his work again when someone knocked on his door. Looking up, Lester watched as Leek scuttled through the door.

“What is it now?”

“I need you to sign this form.” Leek passed over a inventory sheet authorizing the payment of…

“Three thousand pounds? For bugs?!” Lester’s head snapped up. “Are you serious?”

“You wanted me to work out what to feed them.” Leek sounded defensive. “Google is hardly up to date on current Saltopus dinosaur diets.”

“I hardly think champagne and caviar should be on the menu.”

“It isn’t.” Leek looked smug. “This is payment for several crates of beetles.”

Sighing, Lester signed the form. Leek took it and left in a hurry, before Lester could think of a way to make his life more miserable and Lester leaned back in his chair and toyed with his pen.

Some days, MI-6 looked pretty good. But on others, he rather enjoyed the chaos of a job that included managing a dysfunctional team of scientists, Saltopus dinosaurs and crates of bugs being delivered at exorbitant rates.

Of course, he wouldn’t ever tell anyone that.