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ficwizeTitle: Someone to Say Goodbye To
Fandom: Torchwood/Doctor Who
Pairing: Ianto/Lisa, Jack/Ianto
Warnings: Violence, sex, death, the end of the world.
Rating: Adult.
*******************
Return to Prologue and Notes
Return to Part I
Return to Part II
********PART III********
"How long have you been here?" Jack's voice startled Ianto from his thoughts and he glanced over at the other man in surprise. The Captain had spoken little since the Cybermen had pushed their daily rations into their cell.
"I worked at Torchwood for three years," Ianto answered dully.
"I meant in here." Jack was looking at him intently and Ianto shifted, feeling naked despite the clothes the Cybermen had given him a few days after he'd been captured.
"Two weeks, give or take a few days." Ianto answered, cringing backwards slightly as Jack came to sit next to him. The Captain moved slowly, obviously reacting to Ianto's fear.
"Why haven't they Upgraded you?"
"I don't know." Ianto closed his eyes. "At first, they were doing tests..." Jack sucked in a lungful of air and Ianto opened his eyes to see an expression as haunted as his own.
"For emotionless beings, they have a sadistic streak," Jack spoke like he had firsthand knowledge and for the first time since the Cybermen had left the other man in the cell, Ianto wondered why the Cybermen were keeping him alive.
"Yeah." Ianto sighed. "They kept repeating a line about malfunctions and emotions inhibitors. I have no idea what they were talking about."
Jack shifted uncomfortably, and Ianto wondered if perhaps the blood stained clothing hid injuries he couldn’t see. He didn't ask. "From what I've seen," Jack offered, "the Upgrade process involves some sort of emotions inhibitor. Maybe they think that you've done something that caused it to malfunction?"
Ianto choked on a sob. "Lisa."
"Who's Lisa?"
"My girlfriend. She was... partially Upgraded." Ianto clenched his hands into fists to keep them still as he pressed himself back into the corner. Slowly, Jack reached over and covered Ianto's hand with his own. They sat in silence for a long time, until the trembling eased. "They captured her. I don't know where she is."
"I'm sorry, Ianto." Jack's voice was quiet but sincere. Ianto dropped his head and didn't answer, but he neither did he pull his hand away. It had been so long since he had been touched by another person, flesh against his skin, warmth and heat instead of cold dispassion.
"How bad is it?" Ianto looked up, meeting Jack’s eyes. "Outside?"
Jack's eyes darkened, but he didn't look away. "Bad. Very bad. Europe has fallen. Before I was captured, there were rumors of fighting still in Asia and America, but it looks like too little too late."
"It was our fault," Ianto spoke without lifting his gaze from his hand clasped in Jack's. Jack looked over in surprise, and he shrugged. "Torchwood. We brought the ghosts here."
Grief.
That was the emotion that flooded Jack's eyes as he sat and digested the truth. It surprised Ianto, who had expected to see anger or maybe disbelief or defensiveness. Grief was so honest that Ianto started to talk and once he'd started, there was no way to stop. Jack held Ianto's hand through the entire painful and sordid tale, their fingers intertwining in the sense of shared loss.
"What's going to happen to us, Jack?" Ianto finally whispered and the realization that he was looking to someone else for answers was as disappointing as the fact that he didn't care who saw him cry anymore.
"I don't know." Jack answered sadly. "Humanity’s been brought to our knees. By our own hubris." He shook his head. “We’ll fight. As long as we can.”
“What happens when we can’t fight anymore?”
“Then,” Jack’s voice cracked and he coughed to cover it up. “Then…” He trailed off. “I don’t know.”
Much to his surprise, Ianto reacted to Jack's pain. He reached up with his free hand and gently brushed Jack’s cheek. He didn't have any words of comfort, but the way Jack leaned into his touch told Ianto that the other man was trying to forget memories of his own. He leaned forward, and rested his forehead against Jack's.
"How did you get here?" Ianto asked quietly. Jack sat up straighter and Ianto turned, leaning slightly on the other man's shoulder, bolstering him against the wall even as he drew comfort from the heat of the other man's body.
Gradually Jack relaxed, turning his head slightly to press it against Ianto’s. "Torchwood Three is in Cardiff." He lowered his head. "It was in Cardiff."
Ianto snorted ironically. "I know Cardiff. You think the aliens have better things to do than stop there."
The rumble of Jack's chest told Ianto that the other man was laughing and he smiled. "Torchwood Three is smaller than the main division. I had a small team – five people, all brilliant."
Ianto was glad he couldn't see Jack's face. He didn't ask what happened.
"They were so brilliant, we held out in our Hub for two weeks once Cardiff was taken. That was about a week after London fell. Three weeks after Canary Wharf."
"I'm sorry," Ianto whispered. He could almost hear the other part of the story in the silence. "They were lucky." Ianto spoke carefully.
Jack's silence confirmed Ianto's suspicion that the Torchwood Three crew didn't die at the hands of the Cybermen and his eyes filled with tears again. He pulled Jack's hand into his lap and held it with both of his own.
Jack released a breath. "Small mercies," he finally spoke and Ianto knew it would be the last thing he ever said about his teammates. "I tried to escape through the sewers, but they caught me at the outskirts of Cardiff. They took me to the Millennium Stadium Prison Camp."
"Prison Camp?" Ianto sat up straight, eyes wide in surprise.
"They've sprung up all over the world." Jack's voice was utterly empty. "Prison camps where the men and women are sorted. Children, the elderly, anyone who is infirm - the Cybermen don't want them."
Ianto swallowed, remembering the sight of a small hand dangling from a body bag. "Small mercies," he repeated Jack's earlier words and after a long moment, Jack nodded. He moved his free hand to Ianto's arm and began to rub lightly.
"Eventually, the ones selected by the Cybermen were taken for Upgrades." Jack's words were bitter.
"What happened?" Ianto asked, curious to know why Jack had escaped that sentence.
"Something about me threw off their process," Jack finally answered. "The Upgrade Apparatus didn't work. They tested me in the field, but I guess they thought they might have better luck here."
"Oh, Jack." Ianto half turned, his upper body still resting against Jack's shoulder. "I'm so sorry."
Jack managed a lopsided smile and changed the subject. "We got your message."
"You did?"
"Yeah. It gave us hope to know that others had survived in the heart of the battle. You were a reason to keep fighting." He trailed off. "I'm sorry I didn't get here sooner."
The repeated apology made Ianto's gut clench and he opened his mouth to reassure Jack that there was nothing anyone could have done. Instead, the sounds of Cybermen approaching made both men tense and they moved apart instinctively as the Cybermen stopped and stared in at them.
"Jack Harkness." One of the Cybermen opened the door. "You will come with us."
"It's not as easy as that," Jack countered, his voice dark and dangerous. “I won’t go willingly.”
"You will come with us." It repeated, raising its arm and firing a stunning blast at Jack. The blue energy spiraled over Jack's body and Ianto sprang over to help him, only to be struck down by a second blast.
"Ianto Jones. You will remain here."
Ianto lay helpless, body twitching as energy coursed through it. The Cybermen, dragged Jack from the room. By the time Ianto regained control of his muscles, he could hear Jack screaming from down the hall. Curling into a ball, Ianto pressed his hands against his ears and tried to block the sound. It didn’t work, and finally Ianto gave in and let sobs echo back down the hall towards Jack.
It was hours before the Cybermen brought Jack back to the cell. Ianto huddled back into his corner, watching as the guard opened the door and threw the other man in carelessly, throwing his clothes to the side. Jack landed in a heap and made no effort to get up.
As soon as the door was shut, Ianto rushed to Jack's side. He put his hand on Jack's arm and recoiled in horror when Jack started screaming again. "Jack, no! Jack, it's Ianto! You're safe! Jack, you're not with them anymore!"
Jack stopped screaming, eyes slowly focusing on Ianto's face. "Ianto?"
"Oh, God, Jack. I've got you." Ianto pulled Jack up and cradled him, rocking slowly as Jack began to cry, his whole body shaking with great, gasping sobs. Ianto held him as tightly as he could, rocking and murmuring reassurances. "You're all right now, Jack. I've got you. You're fine. I've got you. You're safe."
Lies, they were all lies and Ianto knew it. Still, he couldn't stop himself from offering the shallowest hope of comfort and so he lied, lips pressed into Jack's hair, Jack's weight pushing into Ianto's legs, Jack's arms tangled in his own. Ianto didn't even realize that he was crying until Jack stopped.
Jack twisted, their positions reversed from earlier when Ianto had been seeking comfort, and their eyes met. And then they were kissing. Ianto wasn't even sure who had leaned into whom, all he cared about was the feel of Jack's lips against his own (chapped, cracked, but desperate), the feel of Jack's hand sliding up his arm (rough skin, filthy, but so damn good), the softness of Jack's hair against Ianto's fingers as he caressed it gently.
"Ianto." Jack mumbled against Ianto's lips and Ianto shifted so that he was more firmly under Jack. Dropping his hands down to Jack's back, he held him as gently as he could, afraid to hurt him.
Jack apparently had no such restraint. His hands crushed against Ianto's shoulders, pulling him closer with a raw need and urgency that left Ianto breathless. "Oh, God, Ianto." Jack moaned, shifting so that he straddled the smaller man's legs. Then he was kissing him again, and there was no hesitancy, nothing but urgency and desperation. There was nothing left to lose and Jack’s kiss let Ianto forget everything, even if just for a moment. He shuddered, opening his mouth to Jack's tongue and deepening the kiss.
The two men tangled together and crashed to the floor, their mouths pressed together. For a moment, they just lay there, and then Jack leaned up, breaking the kiss. He stared down at Ianto and the intensity in his eyes took Ianto’s breath. Slowly, gently this time, Jack leaned back down. He kissed Ianto’s lips and then began to lay small kisses all over Ianto’s face, his cheeks, his eyes, and his forehead. Ianto trembled under the gentle onslaught. It had been so long since he’d been with anyone other than Lisa, even longer since he’d been interested in a man.
“I want to touch you, Jack. I want to feel your skin.”
Jack hesitated, but leaned back, the gesture giving Ianto permission to touch him anywhere. Jack's torso was covered with bruises, and Ianto's eyes filled with tears again. This time he was the one on top as he rolled them. Gently, so gently that he wasn’t even sure Jack could feel it, he began to kiss the marks, breathing on them lightly before pressing his lips to them.
Jack laid perfectly still, arms resting lightly at his sides. After Ianto had kissed every bruise he could see, he sat up and gently began to trace Jack’s skin. He could feel the life coursing through Jack's body. Jack’s breath hitched, his eye lids dipping, but he didn’t close them.
“Ianto,” Jack murmured, his voice low and hoarse. “Let me see you.”
Jack's voice was authoritative, and Ianto raised an eyebrow even as his stomach fluttered, but he sat back and pulled his own shirt over his head. Jack made a noise that curled down Ianto's spine and unfurled at the base. Ianto gasped and Jack sat up, kneeling and Ianto knelt as well. “You’re beautiful.” Jack whispered, fingers splaying over Ianto’s stomach and hips.
“Kiss me,” Ianto begged and Jack obliged, leaning in slowly, until his lips pressed gently against Ianto’s throat, against the heartbeat he could feel there. “Jack, please.” Ianto whispered, shivering when Jack’s tongue darted out to lick at the base of Ianto’s throat.
“Jack.”
“Patience, Ianto.” Jack’s voice rumbled against Ianto’s skin and only the fact that it was slightly amused, no longer despairing, kept Ianto from demanding that Jack move faster. Jack’s lips moved up Ianto’s neck and then along his jaw line, pausing long enough for Jack to lick the shell of Ianto’s ear. Jack’s hands travelled up Ianto’s back, soothing and caressing over the faded bruises and marks that decorated Ianto’s own chest and back.
Ianto held his breath, his entire body thrumming with desire. The path where Jack’s fingers had traced tingled and Ianto moaned slightly. “Mmmm,” Jack approved. “Good, Ianto.”
Ianto wrapped his own arms around Jack, pulling the other man close enough that he could have no doubt Ianto was enjoying the attention. Emboldened by Jack’s gasp of pleasure, Ianto lowered his hands and squeezed Jack's backside as he thrust his own hips forward, brushing against Jack’s growing erection.
Jack groaned again and he gave in to Ianto’s unspoken demands and kissed him. He took his time, sliding his tongue into Ianto’s mouth and caressing it slowly with his own. His hands moved constantly, tracing over Ianto's bare back. They were both skin starved and Ianto wasn't sure if the moisture on his cheeks were his tears or Jack's. Ianto placed his palm on Jack's heart. He could feel it pounding under his fingertips, reminding them both that they were alive.
Ianto couldn't tell anymore where his mouth stopped and Jack's began. He breathed out as Jack breathed in; he breathed in when Jack breathed out. He didn't want the kiss to ever end, but when Jack reached up to cup his face, Ianto realized he wanted more. He backed away to look questioningly into Jack's eyes and was startled at the intensity of the return gaze.
“Have you done this before?” Jack whispered and Ianto shook his head.
Jack released a shuddering breath. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t.” Ianto promised. “I want this. I want you. Jack, please.”
Neither of them blinked as Jack's hands dropped to the waist of Ianto's trousers. Ianto had lost so much weight that they slid almost effortlessly over his hips without even unfastening them. When they were shoved almost to his knees, Jack guided Ianto down to lie on the blanket that still lay on the floor. By unspoken agreement, neither of them moved towards the cot.
Jack lay down again and Ianto shifted so that their legs intertwined.
Heat. Ianto felt heat and he basked in it, eyes closed head thrown back. Jack lay heavily on top of him, smelling like sweat and fear, with the tangy metallic scent of blood just underneath the stronger smell of sex.
Everywhere Jack touched, burned. Everywhere Ianto put his hands or mouth on Jack felt molten and the two of them came together in a rejection of the world as it had become. Ianto gasped as Jack pushed a spit slicked finger into him, stretching him slowly. He took his time until Ianto moaned. “Jack, more.”
Jack pushed into Ianto, slowly, so slowly to avoid hurting him, Ianto felt like he was going to shatter. The impending shockwave only grew in strength when Jack began to move. Ianto clutched at him, trying subconsciously to merge them even more together, kissing Jack's shoulder, neck, any part of him that he could reach. When the explosion finally came, Ianto cried out, a mindless, primal sound that pushed Jack over the edge.
Jack collapsed heavily on top of Ianto and Ianto grunted in protest. Lazily, Jack moved to the side, wrapping his arms around the smaller man and pulling him close enough that it almost hurt to breathe. Then, despite the fact that they were lying on the stone floor of a prison cell, for just a little while, nothing else in the world mattered.
***************
Ianto slept a deep and dreamless sleep. When he woke up, it was slowly and he breathed deeply, his face pillowed on Jack's chest. Underneath the grime and sweat, he could smell Jack – pre-dawn rain, hints of darkness and winds, but promising life all the same.
"You're awake," Jack's voice was heavy with sleep, but when Ianto tilted his head to look up, Jack's eyes were clear.
"So are you."
"I suppose I am." Jack's hand rubbed absent circles on Ianto's back.
"How long was I asleep?"
Jack shrugged one shoulder. "I'm not sure. I bet it’s the first sleep you've had in weeks, though."
Ianto sat up, wincing at the new aches and pains in his body. Stone wasn't the most conducive surface when it came to any type of sex. A flash of Jack's face, slack with pleasure, shot through his memory and Ianto made a small noise of protest.
"Are you all right?" Jack sat up, his voice concerned. "Did I hurt you?"
"No." Ianto forced himself to open his eyes and smile reassurance at the other man. "It's not you. I just... I've never cheated on Lisa before."
"Oh." A tiny glimmer of guilt shot through Jack's eyes. "I suppose I should apologize for taking advantage of you." He looked away and Ianto reached out to catch his chin. Forcing their eyes to meet, Ianto smiled.
"No. You shouldn't apologize at all. What we did... it wasn't really about sex."
Jack sighed, his breath gusting hot on Ianto's wrist. "No, it wasn't." Then his lips quirked up in the echo of what would have once been a mischievous grin. "But the sex was pretty good."
Ianto laughed aloud in surprise and then started gathering his clothes. He could feel Jack's eyes following him and much to his own surprise, he realized he was blushing. Finally, he looked over his shoulder at Jack, who was still sitting naked on the blanket like nothing was out of the ordinary. "Yes. It was."
Jack's smile widened, suddenly true, until it was nearly blinding. "I wish that we had met sooner, Jones, Ianto Jones. I can't help but think that you and I would have had a good time together."
Ianto studied Jack as he shrugged back into his shirt. "In another time and place, Captain Harkness, I would agree."
Jack's smile faltered slightly, the merriment leaving his eyes as he reached for his own trousers. Ianto turned his back, going to the remnants of yesterday's meals to search for water. His throat was dry and scratchy, but the dryness in his mouth had little to do with lack of water, and everything to do with his cellmate. Finding a few swallows in one of the paper cups, he drank it slowly, listening as Jack moved about the cell.
Jack, his shirt and trousers still unfastened, moved to stand behind Ianto and put his hands on the younger man's shoulders. Ianto could feel the warmth of Jack's skin and he closed his eyes. "In another time and place," Jack whispered, "you and I would have been an amazing team."
Despite his intentions, Ianto leaned back against Jack's chest. He loved Lisa. He would die for Lisa. He would kill for Lisa. But right now, he was terrified that he was going to die alone and Ianto simply did not have the strength of will to deny himself the comfort and companionship Jack offered, aware that Jack was seeking as much as he was offering. The slight tremble in Jack's fingers, the almost undetectable tremor in his voice, the need that emanated off him - all of this told Ianto that they were holding each other together now.
They stood in silence for a long time. There was nothing to say. The fight was over and every moment was a victory snatched from the inevitable ending.
"Jack, I..." Ianto stopped, stiffening as they heard the first metallic stomp indicating that Cybermen were coming down the hall. Jack's fingers tightened on Ianto's shoulders and they didn't move.
"Maybe they're just bringing us breakfast." Jack offered, but Ianto knew he didn't believe it.
"Maybe." Ianto swallowed. Only Jack's presence at his back and fingers on his shoulders kept Ianto from moving back to his corner. It had never stopped the Cybermen from dragging him out before, but it still felt safer to have his back protected.
"Easy." Jack whispered softly, moving close enough that he was pressed to Ianto from behind. Strangely, Ianto relaxed slightly. Whatever would happen would happen. Until it did, he and Jack would stand together.
Nothing prepared Ianto for what he saw though, as the Cybermen stopped in front of the cell. "Lisa!"
Lisa stared at him impassively. Her body was more Cyber now than it had been, but she was still mostly human. The metal skull cap now had added beams that pierced into the flesh of her neck, and the fleshy parts of her body were covered with a material that looked like tape instead of clothing, but there was no denying who she was.
"Lisa, my God." Ianto didn't even realize he'd moved to the glass until he had both hands pressed against it. "Baby, what have they done to you?"
She blinked at him, her eyes focusing slowly, her face emotionless. "My Upgrade was insufficient. Tests have been run to determine the flaw."
"What are you talking about?" Ianto whispered.
"Ianto Jones." Yvonne's voice came from the Cyberman to Lisa's left. "You interrupted the upgrade procedure and prevented the full implementation of the emotions inhibitor." She turned her gaze to Lisa, watching closely. "It took many days of tests to determine the error."
"It wasn't an error!" Ianto smashed his fist against the wall. "Lisa, look at me!"
"I am looking at you."
"LOOK AT ME!" Ianto screamed, beating the wall again. "See me! You are not a fucking machine! You are human. You are human. Oh, God, Lisa. You're not one of them."
"My upgrade will be completed as soon as the final tests show that the emotions inhibitor is functioning properly."
"What tests?" Jack's voice broke through Ianto's fog. The Captain had remained in the center of the cell and Ianto didn't look at him, but he could hear the wary caution in the other man's voice.
"Computer scans revealed that emotional responses were programmed to override the system in situations involving Ianto Jones." Yvonne's voice was coldly impersonal and the door hummed as the lock was deactivated.
"Ianto, move away from there!" Jack's voice was sharp and Ianto obeyed without thinking about it.
"It is not necessary for Ianto Jones to leave his cell." Yvonne stated as Lisa walked through the door.
"Ianto! Get behind me!"
"She won't hurt me, Jack." Ianto answered, calmly. He stood back in the cell but he didn't move as Lisa approached him. "You won't hurt me, Lisa."
"Cybermen will take away pain." Lisa answered.
"You're not a Cyberman." Ianto's voice was as raw as Lisa's had been bland. "You're Lisa Hallett. You're twenty three years old. You were born in London. Your mother's name is Cecily and your father is Frank. You have two younger brothers, Neil and Gerard."
"Ianto, move away from her." Jack ordered again, but Ianto ignored him.
"You love strawberry ice cream and thunderstorms." Ianto reached up to touch Lisa's cheek. "You don't want anyone to know that you're afraid of mice, but when one got into your flat last Christmas, you knocked over the Christmas tree trying to escape it."
"The emotions inhibitor is working." Yvonne spoke from the door and Ianto glanced at her long enough to see that she was scanning Lisa with a blue light from her chest.
"You love musicals, but you can't carry a tune to save your life." Ianto felt tears sliding down his face. "You say that your favorite food is Indian takeaway, but really it's cheddar and onion flavored crisps." Lisa stared at him blankly and Ianto's voice caught in a sob.
"Lisa, don't you remember?"
"No."
"Don't you remember that day, just before the Cybermen and Daleks invaded?" Ianto begged her. "Don't you remember? We were going to live together?"
There was a sudden spark in Lisa's eyes and she blinked for the first time, focusing on Ianto. "You said you loved me."
"Yes." Ianto smiled around his tears. "I did. I love you, Lisa Hallett. I love you, with all your human imperfections."
Lisa blinked again, then slowly tilted her head down to look at her body. "I'm partially human?"
"You are completely human." Ianto replied fiercely, desperate to convince her, to reach her.
"I'm... ugly." Lisa looked up at him, her eyes cognizant and aware.
"You're beautiful to me." Jack answered. A noise behind Lisa distracted him and he looked over to see Yvonne's scan of Lisa change.
"Flaw has been detected."
"She is not flawed." Ianto growled, moving to stand in between Lisa and the scan.
"You love me." Lisa repeated and Ianto turned, careless of the dangers of Yvonne's scan.
"Yes."
"Then," Lisa hesitated. "My brain could be put in your body. We will be joined permanently."
Ianto closed his eyes, hot tears escaping them. "That's not what love is."
"You do not want to be with me?"
"I do." Ianto looked at her again, and he could see the awareness in her eyes dimming. "I want that very much. But I do not want to be part of you."
"Then we are not compatible." Lisa flicked her wrist and Ianto was suddenly airborne. He crashed against the wall heavily, falling to his knees, the wind knocked from him.
Jack reached Ianto's side in a second, but Ianto shook him off, staggering to his feet. "Lisa! Remember who you are!"
"Ianto, she's not Lisa anymore."
Ianto turned on Jack, shoving him hard into the wall. “Shut up!" He screamed, spit flying from his mouth at the force of his rage. "I can save her!"
"No." Jack's eyes were filled with compassion, but he was resolute, even when Ianto pressed his arm against Jack's windpipe. "You have to believe me. There is no cure. There never will be." Ianto dropped his arms and backed away from Jack in horror, shaking his head and trying to unhear those words. "Listen to me, Ianto. Those who are converted stay that way, your girlfriend will not be the exception."
"You can’t know that for sure." Ianto jerked out of Jack’s grip, running back to Lisa who watched him without any sign of emotion. "You know me! You love me!"
"No." Lisa's answer was hollow and Ianto beat his fists on her chest. She didn't budge and part of him died when he realized how much of her had been changed.
"Yes you do!" Ianto cried, bending forward to bury his face in his forearms and leaning against Lisa heavily. "You love me. You do. You love me."
"No. Love is illogical."
Sudden irrational fury blinded him and Ianto stepped back. His own strength was useless against hers, so he struck out in the only way he knew how, wanting her to hurt as much as she had him. "Then you don't mind that I let Jack fuck me?" He snarled it, wanting the words to sting.
Her reaction was so unexpected that Ianto didn't realize what was happening for a moment. A shrill, penetrating cybertronic noise assailed his ears and he backed away, hands lifted to his head in a useless attempt to block the noise. Looking at Lisa in fear, Ianto realized she was screaming. Two quick steps took her to Jack and Ianto knew with a sickening surety that Jack was going to pay for his words. Lisa lifted her arm and two blasts ripped from the gun at the end.
Jack flew backward, weightless, hitting the wall with a sickening crunch. He looked surprised and then he slid to the ground, boneless. Slowly, he crumpled to his side, the light of life fading from his eyes as Ianto watched.
"Jack," Ianto mouthed Jack's name, but no sound escaped. He scrabbled over the floor until he was kneeling in the spreading blood and cradling Jack's head. He looked up at Lisa in horror. "What have you done?"
Lisa stared at him in shock. Staggering backward, she turned for the door. "Lisa," Ianto's voice broke and she stopped, “what have you become?” He heard her turn towards him, heard her take the two steps to reach him, and felt her foot connect with his chest.
His last thought, as crushing pressure tore through his lungs, was gratitude that he would never become what she had.
***************
Someone was kissing him.
Ianto swam back towards consciousness as if he were flying on a strong wind. If he could have made any noise, Ianto would have cried out in agony. He could feel his chest inflating, the bones of his ribs sliding painfully back into place, the blood coursing through bruised flesh.
Then, suddenly, it was over and all he could feel were lips pressed against his own. Opening his eyes, he stared at Jack blankly. “Jack?”
“Ianto, are you with me again?”
“Jack, what happened?”
Jack froze, his face hovering inches over Ianto’s. “You don’t remember?”
Ianto sat up slowly, Jack helping him, and held his head. “I remember the Cybermen coming.” He closed his eyes, images flashing through his memory. “Lisa!” He gasped and only Jack’s steadying hand on his shoulder kept Ianto from falling again.
“She was… she wouldn’t…” He opened his eyes, staring at Jack in shock. “She killed you!”
“No she didn’t.” Jack shook his head.
“She shot you.” Ianto started shaking. “I held you when you died.” He looked down at his legs. “This is your blood on my trousers!”
“Ianto, calm down.” Jack tried to soothe him, but Ianto pushed away.
“What the fuck is going on?” Ianto struggled to stand and Jack shoved him back to the ground roughly.
“Enough!” Jack barked. Then, more softly, “Enough, Ianto. I’ll tell you everything.”
“About bloody time!” Ianto’s retort was slightly hysterical, but he stilled under Jack’s hand.
“Lisa,” Jack hesitated, taking a deep breath. “Lisa shot me, twice. I died.” Ianto licked his lips, completely unable to think of anything to say. “But,” Jack continued. “I don’t stay dead.”
He looked at Ianto curiously, waiting for a reaction. Ianto licked his lips again. “Why not?” He finally asked.
Jack gave him a watery smile. “It’s a long story, involving a blonde and the Doctor.”
“The Doctor?” Ianto was surprised. “Torchwood’s Number One enemy?”
“He’s not such a bad guy, really.” Jack managed and Ianto shrugged.
“He sure didn’t stick around here once the shit hit the fan.”
Jack’s head snapped around so fast Ianto feared that he’d broken his neck. “The Doctor was here?”
“Yes.” Ianto rubbed his forehead. “Just before the Cybermen and the Daleks showed up. I haven’t seen or heard anything about him since then.”
“That’s what must have happened to the invaders.” Jack sounded so excited that Ianto looked at him again. “The Doctor - he must have done something!”
“You think the Doctor single handedly defeated millions of invading Cybermen and Daleks?” Ianto couldn’t hide his skepticism and Jack laughed, sounding truly joyful.
“You don’t know the Doctor!” Jack stood up and started pacing. “Besides, he probably had Rose with him.”
“Let me guess,” Ianto groaned sliding over so that his back was pressed against the concrete wall. “She’s the blonde?”
“Yes!” Jack spun around to grin at Ianto. “If the Doctor knows about this, then…”
“Then what?” Ianto snapped, stopping Jack short. “He’ll save us? Look around, Jack. It’s over! You said so yourself.”
“Not if the Doctor is involved.” Jack shook his head, refusing to give away the hope that he’d just latched onto. “You don’t know the Doctor.”
“No, I don’t.” Ianto sighed. “But what good is he going to do us now? What about Lisa? What about all the people who’ve been murdered? What can the Doctor do about them?”
Jack deflated, slowly. “Probably nothing.” He finally admitted.
“It’s been over a month, Jack.” Ianto closed his eyes and leaned back, resting his head against the wall. “Your Doctor isn’t coming back. He’s either dead or he’s abandoned us to our own mess.”
“No, I don’t believe that.”
Ianto’s face twisted into a mockery of a grin. “There is no cure. There never will be.” He threw Jack’s words back at him with a viciousness that surprised him.
“Ianto,” Jack came over to sit beside him, but Ianto stopped him.
“You came back from the dead.” He studied Jack’s eyes carefully, looking for answers in their depths. Jack nodded. “And you brought me back, as well.”
It wasn’t a question. Jack looked away first. “I couldn’t watch you die.”
“You’d rather watch them Upgrade me?” Ianto asked bitterly.
“That won’t happen.” Jack wouldn't meet his eyes. “I won’t let it.”
“Jack.” Ianto reached over and covered Jack’s hand with his own. “You won’t be able to stop it.” The truth lay between them like a living thing until finally Ianto broke the silence. “I assume that the reason they brought you here is because they discovered your immortality.”
“Yes.” Jack gestured towards the wall where he’d left his coat. “They shot me when I was trying to escape.”
“That explains the bullet holes and blood stains.” Ianto was watching Jack closely, so he caught the haunted look in the other man’s eyes. “What else did they do to you?”
Jack swallowed. “I was taken to be Upgraded. The procedure didn’t work on me. My body rejected it.”
“Oh, Jack.” Ianto held his hand tighter, but didn’t say anything else.
“They tried every day for a week before they gave up.” Jack’s mouth twisted. “Then they tried to kill me, only they couldn’t.”
“So you ended up here.” Ianto finished the story for him, unable to grasp the horror of that week and mentally refusing to dwell on it. Jack seemed grateful and shrugged.
“So I ended up here.” He finished.
The silence extended until Jack picked up Ianto’s hand and rubbed it over his cheek. “Here’s not so bad,” he added.
Ianto laughed. “We’re in a cell, at the mercy of creatures who don’t even know what mercy is, your blood is on the floor and we’ve both just recently been resurrected.”
Jack shrugged, but he was smiling slightly. “What’s your point?”
“This is the worst place I’ve ever been in my life.”
“Hm.” Jack shrugged. “The company is good.”
Ianto didn’t respond immediately and Jack looked away. “The company is good looking.” Ianto finally allowed. Jack gave him another brilliant smile.
“I’ll settle for good looking.” Jack nodded.
“And modest.”
“And good in bed.” Jack added the last bit with a flourish.
Ianto snorted laughter and Jack raised an eyebrow. “Is that a disagreement?”
“More like a challenge.” The answer left Ianto’s lips before he’d thought it over and his eyes widened when he realized what he’d said. “Jack, I shouldn’t joke-“
He didn’t get to finish his sentence. Jack grabbed the front of his shirt and yanked him close enough kiss. Ianto melted into the embrace, one hand tentatively going to Jack’s cheek. “Now this is a challenge I can’t wait to rise to the occasion for.” Jack whispered, his lips moving against Ianto’s.
The words were playful and they effectively ended any chance of a serious conversation. Part of Ianto was grateful for that, but he would have had to be oblivious to not sense the overwhelming fear under Jack’s flirtatious façade. And he wasn’t oblivious; after all, all Torchwood employees were given basic psychic training.
Ianto ran his hand over Jack’s arm and chests, wondering how many times Jack would suffer at the hands of the Cybermen. He shivered when Jack’s breath, hot and wet, spread across his neck. At the same time, he wondered how many times that breath would be choked off, only to rush back in, life-giving, even when life was no longer wanted.
Jack, whether reacting to Ianto’s thoughts or just lost in the desperation of his own, clung to Ianto like a life raft. Ianto knew, even though Jack would never admit it, that the other man was terrified. The worst thing that could happen to Ianto would end his life. The worst thing that could happen to Jack would not.
This time, it was Ianto who pushed Jack back, guiding them both to the floor. Jack sheltered in between Ianto’s arms, hiding in the illusion of safety. Sweat dripped down their bodies, mingling with dried blood, so that Jack’s hands left a trail of red over Ianto’s body.
Just before it was over, as Ianto was reaching his peak, a shadow across the glass wall made him look up. It was too late to stop, too late to change any of his decisions now, and he cried out Jack’s name. But he didn’t look away from the glass and he didn’t try to avoid Lisa’s gaze.
Jack, underneath him, either didn’t notice that they were being observed or didn’t care. He caught Ianto’s face and pulled him down for a kiss, lips and tongue tangling, breath mingling. When Ianto looked up again, Lisa was gone.
***************
They spent the next week naked as often as possible. Every day, the Cybermen would come and drag one of them away for testing, and the other would end up unconscious on the floor, unable to win against the Cybermen’s strength. When the missing one was returned, the other spent as long as necessary erasing the memory of invading and impersonal touches.
Strangely, Ianto no longer feared the future. He didn’t think about it, and they never discussed it, but every once in a while a hopeful expression crossed Jack's face, and Ianto knew that the other man was thinking about the Doctor. Ianto always looked away. Hope hurt more than the Cybermen’s probes or tortures and Ianto couldn’t lie to himself that things would ever get better.
He was curled against Jack when the dreaded metallic stomping once again made its way down the hallway. Both men tensed. The Cybermen had already been there once that day. Jack still bore the marks to prove it.
The Cybermen that stopped in front of the door studied them for a long moment in silence and Jack tightened his grip on Ianto.
“What do you want?” Jack demanded, angrily.
“Ianto Jones.” The answer was as immediate as it was unexpected and Ianto stiffened in Jack’s arms, eyes huge. Slowly, he climbed to his feet and crossed to stand in front of the partition.
“Lisa?”
“No.” Lisa’s voice answered from the metallic shell and Ianto screamed. He turned away blindly and ran into Jack’s chest. He hadn’t even heard the Captain stand up. Jack’s arms went around him.
“Go away.” Jack snapped.
“Ianto Jones must come with me.”
“No!” Jack barked. “He’s not going with you.”
Ianto, his face tight against Jack’s chest, heard the panic that threatened to destroy them both. “Jack.”
“No!” Jack leaned back far enough to look into Ianto’s eyes. “No! You’re not going with her!”
“Jack Harkness. You will release Ianto Jones.” Another voice joined the conversation and both men turned to see the now familiar Yvonne Cyberman join Lisa. “The Upgrade procedure has been perfected. There is no further cause for delay.”
“You can’t have him!” Jack’s voice was desperate, and he shoved Ianto behind him and blocked the doorway with his own body.
“He is to be Upgraded.” Lisa spoke clearly. “Ianto Jones is to be Upgraded.”
Ianto was shaking so hard he could barely keep his feet under him. “Jack.” Ianto put his hands on Jack’s shoulders and could feel Jack’s heart beating wildly. “We knew this was coming.”
“No.” Jack turned, furious. “I’m not going to let this happen.”
The lock hummed as it deactivated. Ianto turned Jack and reached up to cup his face. He pulled him down and kissed him, slowly, channeling as much of himself as he could into that kiss.
Jack kissed him back like a drowning man fights for air. When Ianto finally stepped back, he wasn’t shaking anymore. “The only regret I have,” he whispered, fingers trailing down Jack’s chest, “is leaving when I had just met you.”
His word seemed to spur Jack into action and Jack turned back to the Cyberman, not caring that it was Lisa, not caring that it was Yvonne, not caring about them at all. “I won’t let you do this!”
“Jack Harkness, you cannot stop us.” Lisa intoned and Jack threw himself at her, fighting furiously. He managed to avoid the worst of her retaliation. Ianto tried to wade into the fight to help his new lover against his old, but a sharp jolt in his back stopped him. Yvonne lowered her arm and came to stand next to him. Ianto watched with a swell of despair as Jack battled an enemy he had no chance of defeating.
“Love is irrational.” Yvonne commented. “It makes humans weak and vulnerable to defeat.”
“You’re wrong.” Ianto replied calmly, as the paralyzing affects of the blast wore off. “It makes us human. It makes us strong.” Jack was flung back against the wall, but on his feet again in an instant, tearing the mattress from the cot and flinging it at Lisa with a cry of rage. “It means that as long as any of us live, we will never be defeated.”
“That is irrational.”
“It’s still true.” Ianto’s heart pounded as Yvonne closed her hand around his arm and dragged him backwards. He fought as best he could, but it was hopeless and he knew it. “Jack. It’s all right.”
“Ianto, no!” Jack quit fighting with Lisa and tried to run after them. Tears blurred Ianto’s vision as he watched Lisa stun Jack. Jack fell to his knees, one hand still reaching towards Ianto. “Ianto!”
Jack’s voice followed Ianto down the hall and he closed his eyes, taking the sound with him. When they strapped him into the machine, he closed his eyes and thought of Jack’s eyes, the gentle caress of his hand on Ianto’s face, the taste of his mouth against Ianto’s, the way he laughed, the way he cried, the way he whispered Ianto’s name intimately.
The whir of a saw broke his train of thought and Ianto took a deep breath, breathing out slowly. The sound grew louder and just before the blade touched the skin of his forehead, Ianto swallowed.
“Goodbye, Jack.”
********EPILOGUE********
“Jack, would you like a cup of tea?” The question startled Jack from where he stared aimlessly into space and he started, turning to look at the speaker with haunted eyes.
“What?”
“Tea?” The Doctor repeated his question calmly, though his heart sank. He watched as Jack turned back to the screen, his face gaunt and his body wired so tightly that the Doctor feared he might shatter.
“No.”
“You’ve not eaten anything in a week.”
Jack barked laughter. “It won’t kill me.”
“Jack.”
“I know.” Jack shot him a bitter look. “I tried. Before you rescued me.” He made the last part an accusation and the Doctor winced.
“It’s over now.”
“Yes.” Jack met his eyes and the Doctor searched them for the remnants of the man he’d once known. “It’s over now.”
The Doctor stood in the doorway quietly, trying to think of something to say. Nothing came to him and he stayed silent.
“Do you ever think about going back and changing things?” Jack asked suddenly. “Saving us? Rose? Ianto?”
“It’s not that easy.”
“It never is.” Jack’s retort was caustic and he turned his back to the Doctor. “Do you ever get tired of it? Watching us destroy ourselves and never learn?”
“You lot are a special breed.” The Doctor came over to sit next to Jack, their legs pressed together comfortably in the small space. “You don’t give up hope easily. You never have. I doubt you ever will.”
Jack closed his eyes, remembering Ianto’s face as he was dragged from the cell. “What good is a useless hope?”
“Do you really think that, Jack?” The Doctor leaned closer and Jack opened his eyes in surprise. “Do you think hope is ever useless?”
Opening his mouth to say yes, Jack paused. He could remember Ianto’s smile, the way his eyes softened when he didn’t think Jack was looking at him, the way he held Jack like he held something precious. Jack swallowed back tears and whispered, “I hope not.”
“Well.” The Doctor smiled, patting Jack’s knee before stood up. “I’m going to bring you tea anyway. It’ll do you good.”
When he reached the door, the Doctor paused, not looking back. “Did you love him, Jack?”
There was a long silence before Jack answered. “Yes, I did.”
“Did you have the chance to say goodbye?” There was something about the way the Doctor asked that question that made Jack think there was a story he didn’t know, but he ignored it.
“Yes, we did.” Jack’s voice was thick as he remembered Ianto’s last kiss.
“So even when the world was headed to hell, you managed to find someone and love him.” The Doctor turned to look at Jack with a mixture of awe and respect. “And he loved you back.”
Jack nodded, tears brimming over his eyes and down his cheeks.
“Sometimes that’s all it takes to change everything.” The Doctor smiled. Jack stared at him for a moment, and then, for the first time since Ianto was taken from him, Jack smiled.
Fandom: Torchwood/Doctor Who
Pairing: Ianto/Lisa, Jack/Ianto
Warnings: Violence, sex, death, the end of the world.
Rating: Adult.
*******************
Return to Prologue and Notes
Return to Part I
Return to Part II
"How long have you been here?" Jack's voice startled Ianto from his thoughts and he glanced over at the other man in surprise. The Captain had spoken little since the Cybermen had pushed their daily rations into their cell.
"I worked at Torchwood for three years," Ianto answered dully.
"I meant in here." Jack was looking at him intently and Ianto shifted, feeling naked despite the clothes the Cybermen had given him a few days after he'd been captured.
"Two weeks, give or take a few days." Ianto answered, cringing backwards slightly as Jack came to sit next to him. The Captain moved slowly, obviously reacting to Ianto's fear.
"Why haven't they Upgraded you?"
"I don't know." Ianto closed his eyes. "At first, they were doing tests..." Jack sucked in a lungful of air and Ianto opened his eyes to see an expression as haunted as his own.
"For emotionless beings, they have a sadistic streak," Jack spoke like he had firsthand knowledge and for the first time since the Cybermen had left the other man in the cell, Ianto wondered why the Cybermen were keeping him alive.
"Yeah." Ianto sighed. "They kept repeating a line about malfunctions and emotions inhibitors. I have no idea what they were talking about."
Jack shifted uncomfortably, and Ianto wondered if perhaps the blood stained clothing hid injuries he couldn’t see. He didn't ask. "From what I've seen," Jack offered, "the Upgrade process involves some sort of emotions inhibitor. Maybe they think that you've done something that caused it to malfunction?"
Ianto choked on a sob. "Lisa."
"Who's Lisa?"
"My girlfriend. She was... partially Upgraded." Ianto clenched his hands into fists to keep them still as he pressed himself back into the corner. Slowly, Jack reached over and covered Ianto's hand with his own. They sat in silence for a long time, until the trembling eased. "They captured her. I don't know where she is."
"I'm sorry, Ianto." Jack's voice was quiet but sincere. Ianto dropped his head and didn't answer, but he neither did he pull his hand away. It had been so long since he had been touched by another person, flesh against his skin, warmth and heat instead of cold dispassion.
"How bad is it?" Ianto looked up, meeting Jack’s eyes. "Outside?"
Jack's eyes darkened, but he didn't look away. "Bad. Very bad. Europe has fallen. Before I was captured, there were rumors of fighting still in Asia and America, but it looks like too little too late."
"It was our fault," Ianto spoke without lifting his gaze from his hand clasped in Jack's. Jack looked over in surprise, and he shrugged. "Torchwood. We brought the ghosts here."
Grief.
That was the emotion that flooded Jack's eyes as he sat and digested the truth. It surprised Ianto, who had expected to see anger or maybe disbelief or defensiveness. Grief was so honest that Ianto started to talk and once he'd started, there was no way to stop. Jack held Ianto's hand through the entire painful and sordid tale, their fingers intertwining in the sense of shared loss.
"What's going to happen to us, Jack?" Ianto finally whispered and the realization that he was looking to someone else for answers was as disappointing as the fact that he didn't care who saw him cry anymore.
"I don't know." Jack answered sadly. "Humanity’s been brought to our knees. By our own hubris." He shook his head. “We’ll fight. As long as we can.”
“What happens when we can’t fight anymore?”
“Then,” Jack’s voice cracked and he coughed to cover it up. “Then…” He trailed off. “I don’t know.”
Much to his surprise, Ianto reacted to Jack's pain. He reached up with his free hand and gently brushed Jack’s cheek. He didn't have any words of comfort, but the way Jack leaned into his touch told Ianto that the other man was trying to forget memories of his own. He leaned forward, and rested his forehead against Jack's.
"How did you get here?" Ianto asked quietly. Jack sat up straighter and Ianto turned, leaning slightly on the other man's shoulder, bolstering him against the wall even as he drew comfort from the heat of the other man's body.
Gradually Jack relaxed, turning his head slightly to press it against Ianto’s. "Torchwood Three is in Cardiff." He lowered his head. "It was in Cardiff."
Ianto snorted ironically. "I know Cardiff. You think the aliens have better things to do than stop there."
The rumble of Jack's chest told Ianto that the other man was laughing and he smiled. "Torchwood Three is smaller than the main division. I had a small team – five people, all brilliant."
Ianto was glad he couldn't see Jack's face. He didn't ask what happened.
"They were so brilliant, we held out in our Hub for two weeks once Cardiff was taken. That was about a week after London fell. Three weeks after Canary Wharf."
"I'm sorry," Ianto whispered. He could almost hear the other part of the story in the silence. "They were lucky." Ianto spoke carefully.
Jack's silence confirmed Ianto's suspicion that the Torchwood Three crew didn't die at the hands of the Cybermen and his eyes filled with tears again. He pulled Jack's hand into his lap and held it with both of his own.
Jack released a breath. "Small mercies," he finally spoke and Ianto knew it would be the last thing he ever said about his teammates. "I tried to escape through the sewers, but they caught me at the outskirts of Cardiff. They took me to the Millennium Stadium Prison Camp."
"Prison Camp?" Ianto sat up straight, eyes wide in surprise.
"They've sprung up all over the world." Jack's voice was utterly empty. "Prison camps where the men and women are sorted. Children, the elderly, anyone who is infirm - the Cybermen don't want them."
Ianto swallowed, remembering the sight of a small hand dangling from a body bag. "Small mercies," he repeated Jack's earlier words and after a long moment, Jack nodded. He moved his free hand to Ianto's arm and began to rub lightly.
"Eventually, the ones selected by the Cybermen were taken for Upgrades." Jack's words were bitter.
"What happened?" Ianto asked, curious to know why Jack had escaped that sentence.
"Something about me threw off their process," Jack finally answered. "The Upgrade Apparatus didn't work. They tested me in the field, but I guess they thought they might have better luck here."
"Oh, Jack." Ianto half turned, his upper body still resting against Jack's shoulder. "I'm so sorry."
Jack managed a lopsided smile and changed the subject. "We got your message."
"You did?"
"Yeah. It gave us hope to know that others had survived in the heart of the battle. You were a reason to keep fighting." He trailed off. "I'm sorry I didn't get here sooner."
The repeated apology made Ianto's gut clench and he opened his mouth to reassure Jack that there was nothing anyone could have done. Instead, the sounds of Cybermen approaching made both men tense and they moved apart instinctively as the Cybermen stopped and stared in at them.
"Jack Harkness." One of the Cybermen opened the door. "You will come with us."
"It's not as easy as that," Jack countered, his voice dark and dangerous. “I won’t go willingly.”
"You will come with us." It repeated, raising its arm and firing a stunning blast at Jack. The blue energy spiraled over Jack's body and Ianto sprang over to help him, only to be struck down by a second blast.
"Ianto Jones. You will remain here."
Ianto lay helpless, body twitching as energy coursed through it. The Cybermen, dragged Jack from the room. By the time Ianto regained control of his muscles, he could hear Jack screaming from down the hall. Curling into a ball, Ianto pressed his hands against his ears and tried to block the sound. It didn’t work, and finally Ianto gave in and let sobs echo back down the hall towards Jack.
It was hours before the Cybermen brought Jack back to the cell. Ianto huddled back into his corner, watching as the guard opened the door and threw the other man in carelessly, throwing his clothes to the side. Jack landed in a heap and made no effort to get up.
As soon as the door was shut, Ianto rushed to Jack's side. He put his hand on Jack's arm and recoiled in horror when Jack started screaming again. "Jack, no! Jack, it's Ianto! You're safe! Jack, you're not with them anymore!"
Jack stopped screaming, eyes slowly focusing on Ianto's face. "Ianto?"
"Oh, God, Jack. I've got you." Ianto pulled Jack up and cradled him, rocking slowly as Jack began to cry, his whole body shaking with great, gasping sobs. Ianto held him as tightly as he could, rocking and murmuring reassurances. "You're all right now, Jack. I've got you. You're fine. I've got you. You're safe."
Lies, they were all lies and Ianto knew it. Still, he couldn't stop himself from offering the shallowest hope of comfort and so he lied, lips pressed into Jack's hair, Jack's weight pushing into Ianto's legs, Jack's arms tangled in his own. Ianto didn't even realize that he was crying until Jack stopped.
Jack twisted, their positions reversed from earlier when Ianto had been seeking comfort, and their eyes met. And then they were kissing. Ianto wasn't even sure who had leaned into whom, all he cared about was the feel of Jack's lips against his own (chapped, cracked, but desperate), the feel of Jack's hand sliding up his arm (rough skin, filthy, but so damn good), the softness of Jack's hair against Ianto's fingers as he caressed it gently.
"Ianto." Jack mumbled against Ianto's lips and Ianto shifted so that he was more firmly under Jack. Dropping his hands down to Jack's back, he held him as gently as he could, afraid to hurt him.
Jack apparently had no such restraint. His hands crushed against Ianto's shoulders, pulling him closer with a raw need and urgency that left Ianto breathless. "Oh, God, Ianto." Jack moaned, shifting so that he straddled the smaller man's legs. Then he was kissing him again, and there was no hesitancy, nothing but urgency and desperation. There was nothing left to lose and Jack’s kiss let Ianto forget everything, even if just for a moment. He shuddered, opening his mouth to Jack's tongue and deepening the kiss.
The two men tangled together and crashed to the floor, their mouths pressed together. For a moment, they just lay there, and then Jack leaned up, breaking the kiss. He stared down at Ianto and the intensity in his eyes took Ianto’s breath. Slowly, gently this time, Jack leaned back down. He kissed Ianto’s lips and then began to lay small kisses all over Ianto’s face, his cheeks, his eyes, and his forehead. Ianto trembled under the gentle onslaught. It had been so long since he’d been with anyone other than Lisa, even longer since he’d been interested in a man.
“I want to touch you, Jack. I want to feel your skin.”
Jack hesitated, but leaned back, the gesture giving Ianto permission to touch him anywhere. Jack's torso was covered with bruises, and Ianto's eyes filled with tears again. This time he was the one on top as he rolled them. Gently, so gently that he wasn’t even sure Jack could feel it, he began to kiss the marks, breathing on them lightly before pressing his lips to them.
Jack laid perfectly still, arms resting lightly at his sides. After Ianto had kissed every bruise he could see, he sat up and gently began to trace Jack’s skin. He could feel the life coursing through Jack's body. Jack’s breath hitched, his eye lids dipping, but he didn’t close them.
“Ianto,” Jack murmured, his voice low and hoarse. “Let me see you.”
Jack's voice was authoritative, and Ianto raised an eyebrow even as his stomach fluttered, but he sat back and pulled his own shirt over his head. Jack made a noise that curled down Ianto's spine and unfurled at the base. Ianto gasped and Jack sat up, kneeling and Ianto knelt as well. “You’re beautiful.” Jack whispered, fingers splaying over Ianto’s stomach and hips.
“Kiss me,” Ianto begged and Jack obliged, leaning in slowly, until his lips pressed gently against Ianto’s throat, against the heartbeat he could feel there. “Jack, please.” Ianto whispered, shivering when Jack’s tongue darted out to lick at the base of Ianto’s throat.
“Jack.”
“Patience, Ianto.” Jack’s voice rumbled against Ianto’s skin and only the fact that it was slightly amused, no longer despairing, kept Ianto from demanding that Jack move faster. Jack’s lips moved up Ianto’s neck and then along his jaw line, pausing long enough for Jack to lick the shell of Ianto’s ear. Jack’s hands travelled up Ianto’s back, soothing and caressing over the faded bruises and marks that decorated Ianto’s own chest and back.
Ianto held his breath, his entire body thrumming with desire. The path where Jack’s fingers had traced tingled and Ianto moaned slightly. “Mmmm,” Jack approved. “Good, Ianto.”
Ianto wrapped his own arms around Jack, pulling the other man close enough that he could have no doubt Ianto was enjoying the attention. Emboldened by Jack’s gasp of pleasure, Ianto lowered his hands and squeezed Jack's backside as he thrust his own hips forward, brushing against Jack’s growing erection.
Jack groaned again and he gave in to Ianto’s unspoken demands and kissed him. He took his time, sliding his tongue into Ianto’s mouth and caressing it slowly with his own. His hands moved constantly, tracing over Ianto's bare back. They were both skin starved and Ianto wasn't sure if the moisture on his cheeks were his tears or Jack's. Ianto placed his palm on Jack's heart. He could feel it pounding under his fingertips, reminding them both that they were alive.
Ianto couldn't tell anymore where his mouth stopped and Jack's began. He breathed out as Jack breathed in; he breathed in when Jack breathed out. He didn't want the kiss to ever end, but when Jack reached up to cup his face, Ianto realized he wanted more. He backed away to look questioningly into Jack's eyes and was startled at the intensity of the return gaze.
“Have you done this before?” Jack whispered and Ianto shook his head.
Jack released a shuddering breath. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t.” Ianto promised. “I want this. I want you. Jack, please.”
Neither of them blinked as Jack's hands dropped to the waist of Ianto's trousers. Ianto had lost so much weight that they slid almost effortlessly over his hips without even unfastening them. When they were shoved almost to his knees, Jack guided Ianto down to lie on the blanket that still lay on the floor. By unspoken agreement, neither of them moved towards the cot.
Jack lay down again and Ianto shifted so that their legs intertwined.
Heat. Ianto felt heat and he basked in it, eyes closed head thrown back. Jack lay heavily on top of him, smelling like sweat and fear, with the tangy metallic scent of blood just underneath the stronger smell of sex.
Everywhere Jack touched, burned. Everywhere Ianto put his hands or mouth on Jack felt molten and the two of them came together in a rejection of the world as it had become. Ianto gasped as Jack pushed a spit slicked finger into him, stretching him slowly. He took his time until Ianto moaned. “Jack, more.”
Jack pushed into Ianto, slowly, so slowly to avoid hurting him, Ianto felt like he was going to shatter. The impending shockwave only grew in strength when Jack began to move. Ianto clutched at him, trying subconsciously to merge them even more together, kissing Jack's shoulder, neck, any part of him that he could reach. When the explosion finally came, Ianto cried out, a mindless, primal sound that pushed Jack over the edge.
Jack collapsed heavily on top of Ianto and Ianto grunted in protest. Lazily, Jack moved to the side, wrapping his arms around the smaller man and pulling him close enough that it almost hurt to breathe. Then, despite the fact that they were lying on the stone floor of a prison cell, for just a little while, nothing else in the world mattered.
Ianto slept a deep and dreamless sleep. When he woke up, it was slowly and he breathed deeply, his face pillowed on Jack's chest. Underneath the grime and sweat, he could smell Jack – pre-dawn rain, hints of darkness and winds, but promising life all the same.
"You're awake," Jack's voice was heavy with sleep, but when Ianto tilted his head to look up, Jack's eyes were clear.
"So are you."
"I suppose I am." Jack's hand rubbed absent circles on Ianto's back.
"How long was I asleep?"
Jack shrugged one shoulder. "I'm not sure. I bet it’s the first sleep you've had in weeks, though."
Ianto sat up, wincing at the new aches and pains in his body. Stone wasn't the most conducive surface when it came to any type of sex. A flash of Jack's face, slack with pleasure, shot through his memory and Ianto made a small noise of protest.
"Are you all right?" Jack sat up, his voice concerned. "Did I hurt you?"
"No." Ianto forced himself to open his eyes and smile reassurance at the other man. "It's not you. I just... I've never cheated on Lisa before."
"Oh." A tiny glimmer of guilt shot through Jack's eyes. "I suppose I should apologize for taking advantage of you." He looked away and Ianto reached out to catch his chin. Forcing their eyes to meet, Ianto smiled.
"No. You shouldn't apologize at all. What we did... it wasn't really about sex."
Jack sighed, his breath gusting hot on Ianto's wrist. "No, it wasn't." Then his lips quirked up in the echo of what would have once been a mischievous grin. "But the sex was pretty good."
Ianto laughed aloud in surprise and then started gathering his clothes. He could feel Jack's eyes following him and much to his own surprise, he realized he was blushing. Finally, he looked over his shoulder at Jack, who was still sitting naked on the blanket like nothing was out of the ordinary. "Yes. It was."
Jack's smile widened, suddenly true, until it was nearly blinding. "I wish that we had met sooner, Jones, Ianto Jones. I can't help but think that you and I would have had a good time together."
Ianto studied Jack as he shrugged back into his shirt. "In another time and place, Captain Harkness, I would agree."
Jack's smile faltered slightly, the merriment leaving his eyes as he reached for his own trousers. Ianto turned his back, going to the remnants of yesterday's meals to search for water. His throat was dry and scratchy, but the dryness in his mouth had little to do with lack of water, and everything to do with his cellmate. Finding a few swallows in one of the paper cups, he drank it slowly, listening as Jack moved about the cell.
Jack, his shirt and trousers still unfastened, moved to stand behind Ianto and put his hands on the younger man's shoulders. Ianto could feel the warmth of Jack's skin and he closed his eyes. "In another time and place," Jack whispered, "you and I would have been an amazing team."
Despite his intentions, Ianto leaned back against Jack's chest. He loved Lisa. He would die for Lisa. He would kill for Lisa. But right now, he was terrified that he was going to die alone and Ianto simply did not have the strength of will to deny himself the comfort and companionship Jack offered, aware that Jack was seeking as much as he was offering. The slight tremble in Jack's fingers, the almost undetectable tremor in his voice, the need that emanated off him - all of this told Ianto that they were holding each other together now.
They stood in silence for a long time. There was nothing to say. The fight was over and every moment was a victory snatched from the inevitable ending.
"Jack, I..." Ianto stopped, stiffening as they heard the first metallic stomp indicating that Cybermen were coming down the hall. Jack's fingers tightened on Ianto's shoulders and they didn't move.
"Maybe they're just bringing us breakfast." Jack offered, but Ianto knew he didn't believe it.
"Maybe." Ianto swallowed. Only Jack's presence at his back and fingers on his shoulders kept Ianto from moving back to his corner. It had never stopped the Cybermen from dragging him out before, but it still felt safer to have his back protected.
"Easy." Jack whispered softly, moving close enough that he was pressed to Ianto from behind. Strangely, Ianto relaxed slightly. Whatever would happen would happen. Until it did, he and Jack would stand together.
Nothing prepared Ianto for what he saw though, as the Cybermen stopped in front of the cell. "Lisa!"
Lisa stared at him impassively. Her body was more Cyber now than it had been, but she was still mostly human. The metal skull cap now had added beams that pierced into the flesh of her neck, and the fleshy parts of her body were covered with a material that looked like tape instead of clothing, but there was no denying who she was.
"Lisa, my God." Ianto didn't even realize he'd moved to the glass until he had both hands pressed against it. "Baby, what have they done to you?"
She blinked at him, her eyes focusing slowly, her face emotionless. "My Upgrade was insufficient. Tests have been run to determine the flaw."
"What are you talking about?" Ianto whispered.
"Ianto Jones." Yvonne's voice came from the Cyberman to Lisa's left. "You interrupted the upgrade procedure and prevented the full implementation of the emotions inhibitor." She turned her gaze to Lisa, watching closely. "It took many days of tests to determine the error."
"It wasn't an error!" Ianto smashed his fist against the wall. "Lisa, look at me!"
"I am looking at you."
"LOOK AT ME!" Ianto screamed, beating the wall again. "See me! You are not a fucking machine! You are human. You are human. Oh, God, Lisa. You're not one of them."
"My upgrade will be completed as soon as the final tests show that the emotions inhibitor is functioning properly."
"What tests?" Jack's voice broke through Ianto's fog. The Captain had remained in the center of the cell and Ianto didn't look at him, but he could hear the wary caution in the other man's voice.
"Computer scans revealed that emotional responses were programmed to override the system in situations involving Ianto Jones." Yvonne's voice was coldly impersonal and the door hummed as the lock was deactivated.
"Ianto, move away from there!" Jack's voice was sharp and Ianto obeyed without thinking about it.
"It is not necessary for Ianto Jones to leave his cell." Yvonne stated as Lisa walked through the door.
"Ianto! Get behind me!"
"She won't hurt me, Jack." Ianto answered, calmly. He stood back in the cell but he didn't move as Lisa approached him. "You won't hurt me, Lisa."
"Cybermen will take away pain." Lisa answered.
"You're not a Cyberman." Ianto's voice was as raw as Lisa's had been bland. "You're Lisa Hallett. You're twenty three years old. You were born in London. Your mother's name is Cecily and your father is Frank. You have two younger brothers, Neil and Gerard."
"Ianto, move away from her." Jack ordered again, but Ianto ignored him.
"You love strawberry ice cream and thunderstorms." Ianto reached up to touch Lisa's cheek. "You don't want anyone to know that you're afraid of mice, but when one got into your flat last Christmas, you knocked over the Christmas tree trying to escape it."
"The emotions inhibitor is working." Yvonne spoke from the door and Ianto glanced at her long enough to see that she was scanning Lisa with a blue light from her chest.
"You love musicals, but you can't carry a tune to save your life." Ianto felt tears sliding down his face. "You say that your favorite food is Indian takeaway, but really it's cheddar and onion flavored crisps." Lisa stared at him blankly and Ianto's voice caught in a sob.
"Lisa, don't you remember?"
"No."
"Don't you remember that day, just before the Cybermen and Daleks invaded?" Ianto begged her. "Don't you remember? We were going to live together?"
There was a sudden spark in Lisa's eyes and she blinked for the first time, focusing on Ianto. "You said you loved me."
"Yes." Ianto smiled around his tears. "I did. I love you, Lisa Hallett. I love you, with all your human imperfections."
Lisa blinked again, then slowly tilted her head down to look at her body. "I'm partially human?"
"You are completely human." Ianto replied fiercely, desperate to convince her, to reach her.
"I'm... ugly." Lisa looked up at him, her eyes cognizant and aware.
"You're beautiful to me." Jack answered. A noise behind Lisa distracted him and he looked over to see Yvonne's scan of Lisa change.
"Flaw has been detected."
"She is not flawed." Ianto growled, moving to stand in between Lisa and the scan.
"You love me." Lisa repeated and Ianto turned, careless of the dangers of Yvonne's scan.
"Yes."
"Then," Lisa hesitated. "My brain could be put in your body. We will be joined permanently."
Ianto closed his eyes, hot tears escaping them. "That's not what love is."
"You do not want to be with me?"
"I do." Ianto looked at her again, and he could see the awareness in her eyes dimming. "I want that very much. But I do not want to be part of you."
"Then we are not compatible." Lisa flicked her wrist and Ianto was suddenly airborne. He crashed against the wall heavily, falling to his knees, the wind knocked from him.
Jack reached Ianto's side in a second, but Ianto shook him off, staggering to his feet. "Lisa! Remember who you are!"
"Ianto, she's not Lisa anymore."
Ianto turned on Jack, shoving him hard into the wall. “Shut up!" He screamed, spit flying from his mouth at the force of his rage. "I can save her!"
"No." Jack's eyes were filled with compassion, but he was resolute, even when Ianto pressed his arm against Jack's windpipe. "You have to believe me. There is no cure. There never will be." Ianto dropped his arms and backed away from Jack in horror, shaking his head and trying to unhear those words. "Listen to me, Ianto. Those who are converted stay that way, your girlfriend will not be the exception."
"You can’t know that for sure." Ianto jerked out of Jack’s grip, running back to Lisa who watched him without any sign of emotion. "You know me! You love me!"
"No." Lisa's answer was hollow and Ianto beat his fists on her chest. She didn't budge and part of him died when he realized how much of her had been changed.
"Yes you do!" Ianto cried, bending forward to bury his face in his forearms and leaning against Lisa heavily. "You love me. You do. You love me."
"No. Love is illogical."
Sudden irrational fury blinded him and Ianto stepped back. His own strength was useless against hers, so he struck out in the only way he knew how, wanting her to hurt as much as she had him. "Then you don't mind that I let Jack fuck me?" He snarled it, wanting the words to sting.
Her reaction was so unexpected that Ianto didn't realize what was happening for a moment. A shrill, penetrating cybertronic noise assailed his ears and he backed away, hands lifted to his head in a useless attempt to block the noise. Looking at Lisa in fear, Ianto realized she was screaming. Two quick steps took her to Jack and Ianto knew with a sickening surety that Jack was going to pay for his words. Lisa lifted her arm and two blasts ripped from the gun at the end.
Jack flew backward, weightless, hitting the wall with a sickening crunch. He looked surprised and then he slid to the ground, boneless. Slowly, he crumpled to his side, the light of life fading from his eyes as Ianto watched.
"Jack," Ianto mouthed Jack's name, but no sound escaped. He scrabbled over the floor until he was kneeling in the spreading blood and cradling Jack's head. He looked up at Lisa in horror. "What have you done?"
Lisa stared at him in shock. Staggering backward, she turned for the door. "Lisa," Ianto's voice broke and she stopped, “what have you become?” He heard her turn towards him, heard her take the two steps to reach him, and felt her foot connect with his chest.
His last thought, as crushing pressure tore through his lungs, was gratitude that he would never become what she had.
Someone was kissing him.
Ianto swam back towards consciousness as if he were flying on a strong wind. If he could have made any noise, Ianto would have cried out in agony. He could feel his chest inflating, the bones of his ribs sliding painfully back into place, the blood coursing through bruised flesh.
Then, suddenly, it was over and all he could feel were lips pressed against his own. Opening his eyes, he stared at Jack blankly. “Jack?”
“Ianto, are you with me again?”
“Jack, what happened?”
Jack froze, his face hovering inches over Ianto’s. “You don’t remember?”
Ianto sat up slowly, Jack helping him, and held his head. “I remember the Cybermen coming.” He closed his eyes, images flashing through his memory. “Lisa!” He gasped and only Jack’s steadying hand on his shoulder kept Ianto from falling again.
“She was… she wouldn’t…” He opened his eyes, staring at Jack in shock. “She killed you!”
“No she didn’t.” Jack shook his head.
“She shot you.” Ianto started shaking. “I held you when you died.” He looked down at his legs. “This is your blood on my trousers!”
“Ianto, calm down.” Jack tried to soothe him, but Ianto pushed away.
“What the fuck is going on?” Ianto struggled to stand and Jack shoved him back to the ground roughly.
“Enough!” Jack barked. Then, more softly, “Enough, Ianto. I’ll tell you everything.”
“About bloody time!” Ianto’s retort was slightly hysterical, but he stilled under Jack’s hand.
“Lisa,” Jack hesitated, taking a deep breath. “Lisa shot me, twice. I died.” Ianto licked his lips, completely unable to think of anything to say. “But,” Jack continued. “I don’t stay dead.”
He looked at Ianto curiously, waiting for a reaction. Ianto licked his lips again. “Why not?” He finally asked.
Jack gave him a watery smile. “It’s a long story, involving a blonde and the Doctor.”
“The Doctor?” Ianto was surprised. “Torchwood’s Number One enemy?”
“He’s not such a bad guy, really.” Jack managed and Ianto shrugged.
“He sure didn’t stick around here once the shit hit the fan.”
Jack’s head snapped around so fast Ianto feared that he’d broken his neck. “The Doctor was here?”
“Yes.” Ianto rubbed his forehead. “Just before the Cybermen and the Daleks showed up. I haven’t seen or heard anything about him since then.”
“That’s what must have happened to the invaders.” Jack sounded so excited that Ianto looked at him again. “The Doctor - he must have done something!”
“You think the Doctor single handedly defeated millions of invading Cybermen and Daleks?” Ianto couldn’t hide his skepticism and Jack laughed, sounding truly joyful.
“You don’t know the Doctor!” Jack stood up and started pacing. “Besides, he probably had Rose with him.”
“Let me guess,” Ianto groaned sliding over so that his back was pressed against the concrete wall. “She’s the blonde?”
“Yes!” Jack spun around to grin at Ianto. “If the Doctor knows about this, then…”
“Then what?” Ianto snapped, stopping Jack short. “He’ll save us? Look around, Jack. It’s over! You said so yourself.”
“Not if the Doctor is involved.” Jack shook his head, refusing to give away the hope that he’d just latched onto. “You don’t know the Doctor.”
“No, I don’t.” Ianto sighed. “But what good is he going to do us now? What about Lisa? What about all the people who’ve been murdered? What can the Doctor do about them?”
Jack deflated, slowly. “Probably nothing.” He finally admitted.
“It’s been over a month, Jack.” Ianto closed his eyes and leaned back, resting his head against the wall. “Your Doctor isn’t coming back. He’s either dead or he’s abandoned us to our own mess.”
“No, I don’t believe that.”
Ianto’s face twisted into a mockery of a grin. “There is no cure. There never will be.” He threw Jack’s words back at him with a viciousness that surprised him.
“Ianto,” Jack came over to sit beside him, but Ianto stopped him.
“You came back from the dead.” He studied Jack’s eyes carefully, looking for answers in their depths. Jack nodded. “And you brought me back, as well.”
It wasn’t a question. Jack looked away first. “I couldn’t watch you die.”
“You’d rather watch them Upgrade me?” Ianto asked bitterly.
“That won’t happen.” Jack wouldn't meet his eyes. “I won’t let it.”
“Jack.” Ianto reached over and covered Jack’s hand with his own. “You won’t be able to stop it.” The truth lay between them like a living thing until finally Ianto broke the silence. “I assume that the reason they brought you here is because they discovered your immortality.”
“Yes.” Jack gestured towards the wall where he’d left his coat. “They shot me when I was trying to escape.”
“That explains the bullet holes and blood stains.” Ianto was watching Jack closely, so he caught the haunted look in the other man’s eyes. “What else did they do to you?”
Jack swallowed. “I was taken to be Upgraded. The procedure didn’t work on me. My body rejected it.”
“Oh, Jack.” Ianto held his hand tighter, but didn’t say anything else.
“They tried every day for a week before they gave up.” Jack’s mouth twisted. “Then they tried to kill me, only they couldn’t.”
“So you ended up here.” Ianto finished the story for him, unable to grasp the horror of that week and mentally refusing to dwell on it. Jack seemed grateful and shrugged.
“So I ended up here.” He finished.
The silence extended until Jack picked up Ianto’s hand and rubbed it over his cheek. “Here’s not so bad,” he added.
Ianto laughed. “We’re in a cell, at the mercy of creatures who don’t even know what mercy is, your blood is on the floor and we’ve both just recently been resurrected.”
Jack shrugged, but he was smiling slightly. “What’s your point?”
“This is the worst place I’ve ever been in my life.”
“Hm.” Jack shrugged. “The company is good.”
Ianto didn’t respond immediately and Jack looked away. “The company is good looking.” Ianto finally allowed. Jack gave him another brilliant smile.
“I’ll settle for good looking.” Jack nodded.
“And modest.”
“And good in bed.” Jack added the last bit with a flourish.
Ianto snorted laughter and Jack raised an eyebrow. “Is that a disagreement?”
“More like a challenge.” The answer left Ianto’s lips before he’d thought it over and his eyes widened when he realized what he’d said. “Jack, I shouldn’t joke-“
He didn’t get to finish his sentence. Jack grabbed the front of his shirt and yanked him close enough kiss. Ianto melted into the embrace, one hand tentatively going to Jack’s cheek. “Now this is a challenge I can’t wait to rise to the occasion for.” Jack whispered, his lips moving against Ianto’s.
The words were playful and they effectively ended any chance of a serious conversation. Part of Ianto was grateful for that, but he would have had to be oblivious to not sense the overwhelming fear under Jack’s flirtatious façade. And he wasn’t oblivious; after all, all Torchwood employees were given basic psychic training.
Ianto ran his hand over Jack’s arm and chests, wondering how many times Jack would suffer at the hands of the Cybermen. He shivered when Jack’s breath, hot and wet, spread across his neck. At the same time, he wondered how many times that breath would be choked off, only to rush back in, life-giving, even when life was no longer wanted.
Jack, whether reacting to Ianto’s thoughts or just lost in the desperation of his own, clung to Ianto like a life raft. Ianto knew, even though Jack would never admit it, that the other man was terrified. The worst thing that could happen to Ianto would end his life. The worst thing that could happen to Jack would not.
This time, it was Ianto who pushed Jack back, guiding them both to the floor. Jack sheltered in between Ianto’s arms, hiding in the illusion of safety. Sweat dripped down their bodies, mingling with dried blood, so that Jack’s hands left a trail of red over Ianto’s body.
Just before it was over, as Ianto was reaching his peak, a shadow across the glass wall made him look up. It was too late to stop, too late to change any of his decisions now, and he cried out Jack’s name. But he didn’t look away from the glass and he didn’t try to avoid Lisa’s gaze.
Jack, underneath him, either didn’t notice that they were being observed or didn’t care. He caught Ianto’s face and pulled him down for a kiss, lips and tongue tangling, breath mingling. When Ianto looked up again, Lisa was gone.
They spent the next week naked as often as possible. Every day, the Cybermen would come and drag one of them away for testing, and the other would end up unconscious on the floor, unable to win against the Cybermen’s strength. When the missing one was returned, the other spent as long as necessary erasing the memory of invading and impersonal touches.
Strangely, Ianto no longer feared the future. He didn’t think about it, and they never discussed it, but every once in a while a hopeful expression crossed Jack's face, and Ianto knew that the other man was thinking about the Doctor. Ianto always looked away. Hope hurt more than the Cybermen’s probes or tortures and Ianto couldn’t lie to himself that things would ever get better.
He was curled against Jack when the dreaded metallic stomping once again made its way down the hallway. Both men tensed. The Cybermen had already been there once that day. Jack still bore the marks to prove it.
The Cybermen that stopped in front of the door studied them for a long moment in silence and Jack tightened his grip on Ianto.
“What do you want?” Jack demanded, angrily.
“Ianto Jones.” The answer was as immediate as it was unexpected and Ianto stiffened in Jack’s arms, eyes huge. Slowly, he climbed to his feet and crossed to stand in front of the partition.
“Lisa?”
“No.” Lisa’s voice answered from the metallic shell and Ianto screamed. He turned away blindly and ran into Jack’s chest. He hadn’t even heard the Captain stand up. Jack’s arms went around him.
“Go away.” Jack snapped.
“Ianto Jones must come with me.”
“No!” Jack barked. “He’s not going with you.”
Ianto, his face tight against Jack’s chest, heard the panic that threatened to destroy them both. “Jack.”
“No!” Jack leaned back far enough to look into Ianto’s eyes. “No! You’re not going with her!”
“Jack Harkness. You will release Ianto Jones.” Another voice joined the conversation and both men turned to see the now familiar Yvonne Cyberman join Lisa. “The Upgrade procedure has been perfected. There is no further cause for delay.”
“You can’t have him!” Jack’s voice was desperate, and he shoved Ianto behind him and blocked the doorway with his own body.
“He is to be Upgraded.” Lisa spoke clearly. “Ianto Jones is to be Upgraded.”
Ianto was shaking so hard he could barely keep his feet under him. “Jack.” Ianto put his hands on Jack’s shoulders and could feel Jack’s heart beating wildly. “We knew this was coming.”
“No.” Jack turned, furious. “I’m not going to let this happen.”
The lock hummed as it deactivated. Ianto turned Jack and reached up to cup his face. He pulled him down and kissed him, slowly, channeling as much of himself as he could into that kiss.
Jack kissed him back like a drowning man fights for air. When Ianto finally stepped back, he wasn’t shaking anymore. “The only regret I have,” he whispered, fingers trailing down Jack’s chest, “is leaving when I had just met you.”
His word seemed to spur Jack into action and Jack turned back to the Cyberman, not caring that it was Lisa, not caring that it was Yvonne, not caring about them at all. “I won’t let you do this!”
“Jack Harkness, you cannot stop us.” Lisa intoned and Jack threw himself at her, fighting furiously. He managed to avoid the worst of her retaliation. Ianto tried to wade into the fight to help his new lover against his old, but a sharp jolt in his back stopped him. Yvonne lowered her arm and came to stand next to him. Ianto watched with a swell of despair as Jack battled an enemy he had no chance of defeating.
“Love is irrational.” Yvonne commented. “It makes humans weak and vulnerable to defeat.”
“You’re wrong.” Ianto replied calmly, as the paralyzing affects of the blast wore off. “It makes us human. It makes us strong.” Jack was flung back against the wall, but on his feet again in an instant, tearing the mattress from the cot and flinging it at Lisa with a cry of rage. “It means that as long as any of us live, we will never be defeated.”
“That is irrational.”
“It’s still true.” Ianto’s heart pounded as Yvonne closed her hand around his arm and dragged him backwards. He fought as best he could, but it was hopeless and he knew it. “Jack. It’s all right.”
“Ianto, no!” Jack quit fighting with Lisa and tried to run after them. Tears blurred Ianto’s vision as he watched Lisa stun Jack. Jack fell to his knees, one hand still reaching towards Ianto. “Ianto!”
Jack’s voice followed Ianto down the hall and he closed his eyes, taking the sound with him. When they strapped him into the machine, he closed his eyes and thought of Jack’s eyes, the gentle caress of his hand on Ianto’s face, the taste of his mouth against Ianto’s, the way he laughed, the way he cried, the way he whispered Ianto’s name intimately.
The whir of a saw broke his train of thought and Ianto took a deep breath, breathing out slowly. The sound grew louder and just before the blade touched the skin of his forehead, Ianto swallowed.
“Goodbye, Jack.”
“Jack, would you like a cup of tea?” The question startled Jack from where he stared aimlessly into space and he started, turning to look at the speaker with haunted eyes.
“What?”
“Tea?” The Doctor repeated his question calmly, though his heart sank. He watched as Jack turned back to the screen, his face gaunt and his body wired so tightly that the Doctor feared he might shatter.
“No.”
“You’ve not eaten anything in a week.”
Jack barked laughter. “It won’t kill me.”
“Jack.”
“I know.” Jack shot him a bitter look. “I tried. Before you rescued me.” He made the last part an accusation and the Doctor winced.
“It’s over now.”
“Yes.” Jack met his eyes and the Doctor searched them for the remnants of the man he’d once known. “It’s over now.”
The Doctor stood in the doorway quietly, trying to think of something to say. Nothing came to him and he stayed silent.
“Do you ever think about going back and changing things?” Jack asked suddenly. “Saving us? Rose? Ianto?”
“It’s not that easy.”
“It never is.” Jack’s retort was caustic and he turned his back to the Doctor. “Do you ever get tired of it? Watching us destroy ourselves and never learn?”
“You lot are a special breed.” The Doctor came over to sit next to Jack, their legs pressed together comfortably in the small space. “You don’t give up hope easily. You never have. I doubt you ever will.”
Jack closed his eyes, remembering Ianto’s face as he was dragged from the cell. “What good is a useless hope?”
“Do you really think that, Jack?” The Doctor leaned closer and Jack opened his eyes in surprise. “Do you think hope is ever useless?”
Opening his mouth to say yes, Jack paused. He could remember Ianto’s smile, the way his eyes softened when he didn’t think Jack was looking at him, the way he held Jack like he held something precious. Jack swallowed back tears and whispered, “I hope not.”
“Well.” The Doctor smiled, patting Jack’s knee before stood up. “I’m going to bring you tea anyway. It’ll do you good.”
When he reached the door, the Doctor paused, not looking back. “Did you love him, Jack?”
There was a long silence before Jack answered. “Yes, I did.”
“Did you have the chance to say goodbye?” There was something about the way the Doctor asked that question that made Jack think there was a story he didn’t know, but he ignored it.
“Yes, we did.” Jack’s voice was thick as he remembered Ianto’s last kiss.
“So even when the world was headed to hell, you managed to find someone and love him.” The Doctor turned to look at Jack with a mixture of awe and respect. “And he loved you back.”
Jack nodded, tears brimming over his eyes and down his cheeks.
“Sometimes that’s all it takes to change everything.” The Doctor smiled. Jack stared at him for a moment, and then, for the first time since Ianto was taken from him, Jack smiled.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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Date: 2008-09-02 01:56 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2008-09-02 06:38 pm (UTC)Beautiful.
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Date: 2008-09-02 07:10 pm (UTC)Thank you so much for your help with this monster of a fic. :)
I'm really glad you enjoyed it!
And yes, the cover art is amazing! Bonk surprised me with it after I bent his ear with the plot for the thousandth time. :)
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Date: 2008-09-03 07:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-03 09:44 pm (UTC)This was my second TW fic, but it probably won't be my last.
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Date: 2008-09-03 07:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-03 09:44 pm (UTC)Thanks so much for letting me know what you think. :)
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Date: 2008-09-08 04:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-04 04:16 pm (UTC)And so tragic! I love angst, and dark fic - this goes there and kicks you a little bit more, while you're down. Fantastic!
I'm sorry I couldn't say thank you earlier - I went online when I was waiting for the shuttlebus to take me to the airport, at the end of Dragon*Con, and read it there in the hotel lobby, but then I had to fly home before I could comment.
God, poor Jack. Poor Ianto. Poor Lisa. I so wanted her to keep fighting her conditioning, because I knew that was the only thing that was keeping Ianto alive.
I especially loved the epilogue. “So even when the world was headed to hell, you managed to find someone and love him.” The Doctor turned to look at Jack with a mixture of awe and respect. “And he loved you back.” God, that sums up how I think of both the Doctor and Jack. Although, the Doctor was a bit late this time, wasn't he? :)
Wow. Thank you again. This was an awesome ending of the world.
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Date: 2008-09-08 04:20 pm (UTC)I am SO glad you liked this. I have no idea what happened with this story. One minute I thought I had an idea, the next I had a huge story that was too big to scrap and start over if I was getting it wrong!
Thank you for such an inspiring request. I'd never seen Dr. Who before I hunted down the finale to season 2 (OMG, it broke me), but I've quickly become an addict.
I really grew to like Lisa in this fic. I hadn't thought much about her before, but this was so very fun to write (if that makes sense).
at the end of Dragon*Con - I was at Dragon*Con! I had a blast and I am very amused now that we were in the same place at the same time and didn't know it. :D
You are welcome for the fic. I'm so glad you liked it! Thank YOU for such nice feedback. :)
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Date: 2008-09-04 10:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-08 04:16 pm (UTC)Yeah, the Doctor does that to people. :)
Thank you so much!
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Date: 2008-09-05 12:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-09-08 04:17 pm (UTC)Thanks in VERY large part to you and your hard work. Thank YOU, so much.
:)
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Date: 2008-09-13 12:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-03 02:47 am (UTC)An interesting twist on things and maybe Jack and Ianto meeting and sharing that did something. Maybe Ianto's upgrade didn't quite work, like Lisa's, all for Jack.
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Date: 2008-12-08 04:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-08 03:02 pm (UTC)Sad, but beautiful sad. Gorgeous AU, very well done.
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Date: 2008-12-08 04:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-03-26 03:47 pm (UTC)That was...wow. I kept expecting Ianto to be saved at the last minute, and then he WASN'T, and just... jeez.
I would never be brave enough to write an ending like that. It was heart-wrenchingly beautiful. Great job. :D
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Date: 2009-07-06 04:01 am (UTC)